Do you remember when I was a kid and you would put me to bed each night? Sometimes you'd lay beside me for a few minutes, sometimes you'd read to me, and you'd always kiss me on my forehead and say "Good night, Sunshine". Then, as you'd leave my room to head downstairs again, I would always say "I'll call you if I need you". It was like a security blanket call. As long as those words were said, I felt safe and secure knowing that if I needed you, I could just call out to you and you'd be there right away. I know I used it a few times too - for a glass of water or an extra hug when I was very little. And at every other stage of my life too. I called you to pick me up from a friends house. As I got older, I called you from far away places when I needed your advice, or was homesick. After I moved away from home, I called you from my new apartment when I needed something fixed. After I was married, I called you when my husband was away and there was a mouse in my basement. I called you to take care of my babies when I needed to get a shower or go out for something. I called you to pick up my kids from school or sit with them when they were home sick from school. I called you hundreds of times and you were always there, always happy to hear from me and eager to help.
You were my hero, my rock, my home base. You made me feel secure and confident. Nothing was impossible, because I could always call you if I needed you.
Now you are gone.
Who will I call if I need help?
I am lost.
Someday I will find myself again ... perhaps by calling on the 41 years I had with you, and all the strength, love and courage you gave me.
Love your sunshine

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